On a recent morning, I was awakened at 5:30am by my washer delivery people calling to say they were lost near my home while trying to deliver during a 6-10 delivery time window. Who delivers at 6 much less 5 freaking 30 in the am ?!? …in the dark in the country. That’s the kind of thing that gets someone accidently shot.
Not by me, mind you, cause I was asleep, but I have neighbors with shotguns that they have been known to pull out if someone looks suspicious. I’m talking about a moving truck pulling up to my house in the middle of the night and two grown men getting out while one stays in the truck to be the lookout / getaway driver suspicious…and before you ask, yes, they were wearing hoodies – it is actually somewhat chilly at 5:30am! They unloaded the washer and went on their merry way.
Then, I got ready for work.
Then, I got into my Nissan Leaf and was excited that I was going to be fairly on time for work on account of the delivery people showing up before the arse crack of dawn.
Then, I sat in traffic…
…for
…two
…hours.
On the upside, I grew 5 trees and only used 40% of a charge. Man, I love this car! Because if you have to sit in traffic for two hours, you should at least have twice your personal record of trees to show for it! It was nice to think of all the gas money I’d saved!

Ps. Yes, I had plenty of juice left to get home in the evening. :)

Please forgive me, as today, I’m going to kind of cheat and not write a full post. Hopefully, you’ll forgive me as I share that I feel a tad famous. Observe.

I drove a couple of friends to Taco Bell for lunch. Per my usual M.O., I parked somewhat far from the door so as not to get any door dings (5 parking spaces). My non-pregnant friend A commented that I was making friend B walk a bit far considering she was about 7 months pregnant with twins. So, when we went to Target to pick up a couple of things twenty minutes later, I dropped them off right in front of the door. I waited for an opening in the not really that heavy Target parking lot traffic and calmly found a parking spot and turned off my car.

I noticed that a cop had pulled up behind me and blocked me in, but I was sure I hadn’t done anything wrong, so clearly he wasn’t about to speak to me, he must have just been pausing. As I exited my vehicle, he started to speak.

Police Officer: “Was there some reason you pulled over into traffic? Were you dropping someone off?”
Me: “Yes.” (in my head, I wondered how he didn’t see them exit the vehicle)
Police Officer: “Is that a Leaf? How are you liking it?”
Me: (smiling broadly) “Yes. I love it!!”
Police Officer: “Are they not ambulatory?”
Me: (what?) “Well, one of them is 7 months pregnant with twins.” (does that count?)
Police Officer: “Well, you stopping there caused a lot of confusion.”
Me: (that confused you? um, you carry a gun, I’m a little concerned that you are that easily confused…deep breath. You want everyone to love the Leaf as much as you do so that at some point everyone will be driving them and be as happy with their cars as you are.) “I’m sorry. I wasn’t trying to confuse anyone; I was just trying to drop off my friend. How do you recommend I handle this in the future?” (with a nice smile)
Officer: “Just stop there. I know it is the fire lane, but just stop in the fire lane like you own it and have them cross the street.”
Me: (um, what if someone gets confused and accidently runs them over…I guess I’ll loop around the parking lot and come in from the other side so I’m not “on the wrong side of the road”)
Officer: “I could give you a ticket.”
Me: (The parking lot is private property, so you cannot give me a ticket, but thanks.) “Well, I appreciate your concern. I’ll be sure not to do that in the future.”
Officer: “You could get them one of the scooters.”
Me: (are you actually suggesting I park the car and myself go walk into Target and ride the scooter through the parking lot so she can ride it into the store? She’s 7 months pregnant with twins, not elephants. and she’s 35, not 60. AND there is zero chance I can talk her into that AND I think THAT whole ordeal would cause confusion.) “Ok, well, that’s an idea. Thank you.” (This is the weirdest exchange I’ve ever had with an officer. It is like he’s being crazy nice while being a jerk. I have no idea what to do with this. It is Valentine’s Day, is this guy trying to hit on me? I have no idea what is going on….which it occurs to me happens more frequently than I think it should.)
Officer: “So, you’re liking your Leaf?”
Me: (more grinning while thinking “what in the world?” This is like good cop/bad cop, but it is the same guy!) “I love it! I save over 220 dollars a month on gas and I never have to stop to buy gas! It is great!”
Officer: (coming over to inspect it) “So, is it everything you expected?”
Me: “Absolutely! Would you like to see inside?” (I go back and unlock/open the door so he can take a gander inside)
Officer: “Oh, you got the leather. nice.”
Me: “Yes, I love it!” (at this point, I’m wondering if I’m grinning so big he might haul me in thinking I’m high.)
More chatting. In the end, he wrapped it up with another mini-lecture about how I need to just park in the fire lane so I don’t cause confusion and I smiled with all the charm I have and said thank you and wished him a nice day.

The current theory is that he wanted to chat me up about my Leaf and was just looking for an excuse to talk to me, so he over-reacted to my “lane-changing”. But, I have to admit that while I am perfectly respectful of Police Officers (after all, they risk their lives every day for the rest of us), this is the most pleasant I’ve ever been while being threatened with a ticket.


Ps. Happy Anniversary, Parents!