So, there was a little more to the Lochness Mitts story than I might have first revealed. I knit the second mitt and was almost finished before I realized I’d done something really funky with the cabling very near the beginning. So funky that I started to wonder if I was getting enough water in the dry mountain air. I got some more water and stared at the mitt for a good thirty minutes analyzing my options before deciding to take a picture and then rip back to the ribbing. Instead of a lovely perfect line of interlinked rings, there was a complete perfectly round circle in the middle of a smooth interlinked chain. Think of the olympic rings if one of them was not interlocked, but was just kind of floating up against the others. In the end, all I could do was quietly watch the x-files movie and murmur “ribbit” to myself as I pulled out almost an entire mitt. How did I not notice the glaring mistake earlier? How did I somehow get SO off in my cabling? Could I have lived with it? Would the painter have noticed?

Probably. She is, after all, a rocket scientist.

I drove a couple of friends to Taco Bell for lunch. Per my usual M.O., I parked somewhat far from the door so as not to get any door dings (5 parking spaces). My non-pregnant friend A commented that I was making friend B walk a bit far considering she was about 7 months pregnant with twins. So, when we went to Target to pick up a couple of things twenty minutes later, I dropped them off right in front of the door. I waited for an opening in the not really that heavy Target parking lot traffic and calmly found a parking spot and turned off my car.

I noticed that a cop had pulled up behind me and blocked me in, but I was sure I hadn’t done anything wrong, so clearly he wasn’t about to speak to me, he must have just been pausing. As I exited my vehicle, he started to speak.

Police Officer: “Was there some reason you pulled over into traffic? Were you dropping someone off?”
Me: “Yes.” (in my head, I wondered how he didn’t see them exit the vehicle)
Police Officer: “Is that a Leaf? How are you liking it?”
Me: (smiling broadly) “Yes. I love it!!”
Police Officer: “Are they not ambulatory?”
Me: (what?) “Well, one of them is 7 months pregnant with twins.” (does that count?)
Police Officer: “Well, you stopping there caused a lot of confusion.”
Me: (that confused you? um, you carry a gun, I’m a little concerned that you are that easily confused…deep breath. You want everyone to love the Leaf as much as you do so that at some point everyone will be driving them and be as happy with their cars as you are.) “I’m sorry. I wasn’t trying to confuse anyone; I was just trying to drop off my friend. How do you recommend I handle this in the future?” (with a nice smile)
Officer: “Just stop there. I know it is the fire lane, but just stop in the fire lane like you own it and have them cross the street.”
Me: (um, what if someone gets confused and accidently runs them over…I guess I’ll loop around the parking lot and come in from the other side so I’m not “on the wrong side of the road”)
Officer: “I could give you a ticket.”
Me: (The parking lot is private property, so you cannot give me a ticket, but thanks.) “Well, I appreciate your concern. I’ll be sure not to do that in the future.”
Officer: “You could get them one of the scooters.”
Me: (are you actually suggesting I park the car and myself go walk into Target and ride the scooter through the parking lot so she can ride it into the store? She’s 7 months pregnant with twins, not elephants. and she’s 35, not 60. AND there is zero chance I can talk her into that AND I think THAT whole ordeal would cause confusion.) “Ok, well, that’s an idea. Thank you.” (This is the weirdest exchange I’ve ever had with an officer. It is like he’s being crazy nice while being a jerk. I have no idea what to do with this. It is Valentine’s Day, is this guy trying to hit on me? I have no idea what is going on….which it occurs to me happens more frequently than I think it should.)
Officer: “So, you’re liking your Leaf?”
Me: (more grinning while thinking “what in the world?” This is like good cop/bad cop, but it is the same guy!) “I love it! I save over 220 dollars a month on gas and I never have to stop to buy gas! It is great!”
Officer: (coming over to inspect it) “So, is it everything you expected?”
Me: “Absolutely! Would you like to see inside?” (I go back and unlock/open the door so he can take a gander inside)
Officer: “Oh, you got the leather. nice.”
Me: “Yes, I love it!” (at this point, I’m wondering if I’m grinning so big he might haul me in thinking I’m high.)
More chatting. In the end, he wrapped it up with another mini-lecture about how I need to just park in the fire lane so I don’t cause confusion and I smiled with all the charm I have and said thank you and wished him a nice day.

The current theory is that he wanted to chat me up about my Leaf and was just looking for an excuse to talk to me, so he over-reacted to my “lane-changing”. But, I have to admit that while I am perfectly respectful of Police Officers (after all, they risk their lives every day for the rest of us), this is the most pleasant I’ve ever been while being threatened with a ticket.


Ps. Happy Anniversary, Parents!

If you haven’t seen the movie, please stop reading unless you are fine with spoilers, in which case, carry on.

This was a pretty good movie, but I don’t think it hurts to go into it with low expectations. I was thinking there would be some running and chasing and probably some shooting and some running and a little more chasing. It had all that and oh so much more:

• A little bit of Ryan Reynolds with his shirt off to prove that his Green Lantern trainer is still employed.
• A lesson for the ladies – If you hear gunfire, don’t just stand in the middle of the living room. That is how you get dead.
• The best movie line I’ve heard in awhile – regarding Denzel, “You’re like a black Dorian Gray.” – He totally is!
• Suspension of reality – RR gets stabbed in the stomach and then several minutes later, muscles up the power to strangle a healthy man to death
• Poor portrayal of tactical teams – Random heavily armed guys break into one of your safe houses and you do a crazy poor job of defending it. You don’t even bother to put on any protective gear. In fact, you sport a bright flannel shirt. good plan.

I recommend this movie for pure entertainment value. I’m already looking forward to renting it because I feel like this list should be quite a bit longer.