If you find a non-knitter that is both sweet and smart enough to go to a local yarn shop and buy you locally hand-painted sock yarn and send it to you as a surprise, you should marry that person. Now, if you’re already married to a boy and said person is a girl and it just so happens that she prefers boys also, then you should get your husband’s brother to marry her. On the off chance that this brother was smart enough on his own to realize what a total fracking gem of a person she is and snap her up right away, then you are the luckiest person alive.

…and having just decided that I am the luckiest person alive, I’m off to buy a lottery ticket.